i didn't. i just didn't.
i didn't think i'd find the strength to be brave.
and even if i did, i didn't believe anyone would ever want to love me.
i figured, if i was lucky, i might end up married someday.
if. if i was lucky enough.
i remember all the times i cried myself to sleep, because i thought i'd be alone forever.
but i have learned that what i've lost in the past isn't going to effect my future. not anymore.
no matter how many friends i've lost, no matter how many friends have let me down and disappointed me and made me not want to love someone ever again, that's not how it's always going to be.
“everyone who terrifies you is sixty-five percent water, and everyone you love is made of stardust, and i know sometimes you cannot even breathe deeply, and the night sky is no home, and you have cried yourself to sleep enough times that you are down to your last two percent, but nothing is infinite, not even loss. you are made of the sea and the stars, and one day you are going to find yourself again."
- finn butler -