project Feathers, 2013

for one week last november, i opened up Genuine for you to come and tell your story to the world.

now i'm giving you that chance again.

this time, for the first week in September.

so that gives you plenty of time to write out your beautiful story, if you feel called to tell it.

what i want is to hear about your brokeness. i want to hear the raw pain, nothing sugar-coated.

i want to hear about your whole genuine life. i want to hear about what has happened to bring you to where you are right now. what's happened to hurt you. what's happened to heal you. how you've changed. and if you haven't healed, write about that. i want to know all about it. i won't judge, and if you'd like to keep it all anonymous, i respect that completely.

so if you feel like it's time to tell that story, please do.

email it to me anytime before September first.

this time around, i'm not setting a limit as to how many stories i'll be taking. last time, i believe it was seven. but this time, if it needs to run more than a week, so be it. i'm letting God run this show here.

so tell all your friends! be creative. use photos from your past if you want. i want you to make this story your own. because it already is.

i'll look forward to hearing about who YOU ARE, beautiful.

don't be afraid to let it take it's natural course and be real. you don't have to write well, you just have to write what you feel. 

that's all i ask.

god bless, y'all! 

xx. hannah.

further details:

"Project Feathers, 2013" participants will receive one silicone "Genuine- Always Choose Real" wristband with the entering of their story, so be sure to include your addresses with your story via email if you'd like to claim your bracelet! :)

a special video for Project Feathers!

i am so super stoked about this little video i put together over the weekend! tell me what you think...


correction: 2013's project will be on November 11th-17th as it was this year.

Project Feathers 2012 // Neeley

I grew up in a Christian home with strong Christians for parents. Prior to my conversion, I had mixed feelings about God. I refused to obey God's words and often had anger towards Him. Yet I had a strange longing towards the Gospel.  I doubted my assurance and, often, I doubted if God existed. 

 In the past I had asked God to save me, yet I refused to believe he had. Even though I felt hopeless and weak, I still had hope in God. 

Around two years back I went to a youth retreat that would change my life forever. The theme of the retreat was "Whose Glory." And it challenged us to think of whose glory we lived for.

Whose glory did I live for? Mine.

The afternoon before the last night I found myself shaken and not wanting to be around anyone. Something wasn't right. I talked to my Mom about it a little before, but I felt wrong. I so understood at the beginning of the last session. Tears spilled down my face. I knew God was asking me to come to him. In the past, I didn't want to. But now I realized I was attached to chains that held me down hard.

And I wanted to be set free in the name of the Gospel.

I prayed that night. Really prayed for the first time in my life. Not just talking, but pleading with all of me God would save my soul. That's when our youth pastor came to the front and read the verse in Romans: anyone who calls upon the name of the Lord will be saved. They asked anyone who needed prayer to come to the front for prayer. I did. The pastor up there prayed for me. Two of my good friends came and prayed with me also. And I called upon His name. I felt shaken. I felt free. I felt raw. I felt new. 

From that day, I've been learning the life of a daughter of Christ isn't easy. It isn't clear. It's confusing. It's hard. But it's so sweet. I've learned the gospel isn't about being perfect, it's about His perfect blood washing our past and future sin clean. The point of the cross is we are ruined and we'll still sin. But there is hope through Jesus Christ!

And it keeps getting better.

Every day God teaches me more, draws me in deeper. I want to be a missionary for the rest of my life, proclaiming this wonderful news to all people. Jesus Christ came to save sinners like me. Sinners like you.

Stand Firm!

four

// watching one of my besties drive up my street :) way to go, Tess!

// have your way by britt nicole

// this completely insanely amazing week of project Feathers!

// thanksgiving break excitement

xoxo and happy friday! <3

hannah

Project Feathers 2012 // Dana

My parents sat me and my siblings around our table on September 5th, 2010, and told us they were separating.  I would later find out that this meant divorce.

Ever since that day, my life hasn’t been normal.  Even after 2 years, I’m still wounded.  I think I will be forever.

Being a child of a divorce is the worst thing you can go through, in my opinion.  The reason that you’re alive– your parents’ marriage– is no longer stable.  It feels as if your whole life, your very being, is being unraveled.  Maybe your parents are really good about it all, and leave you primarily out of it.  But it really doesn’t matter.  No matter what they do or don’t do, you’ll end up feeling unwanted.

Me personally?  I know my mom loves me.  And even though I’m still mad at my dad for leaving, I know that he loves me too.  But sometimes, I feel like a parcel being passed between 2 houses.  Or maybe a waste of money– it’s only because of the court that he has to pay for that, or her for this.

I can’t help but feel so very alone.

I’ve always been a quiet girl.  I have a few friends, and only a handful that I’m close to.  But even so, I couldn’t bring myself to tell any of them.  I think I thought that if I didn’t talk about it, it would somehow go away, or at least become less of a problem.  I think this was a mistake, not talking to anyone about it, and I only started opening up in the last few months.  But the fact is, the first 18 months of this experience were the hardest in my life.

I’d cry myself to sleep.  I’d feel frustration like I’d never felt before.  I’d get so mad at my dad I couldn’t even say, “I love you, too.”  I still can’t But I so, so wish that I could.  I wish things were back to normal.  But normal no longer exists.

This was the very first situation that I’d been in that I couldn’t do anything.  No matter what I said or did, nothing would change.  It wasn’t as if I could force my parents back together.  The only real option that I had was to surrender to God.

Jesus was the only one who was always with me, without fail.  I have gone through some hard things.  But I still trust him.  I know that sin is in this world, so bad things– horrid things– happen.  But out of each of those bad things, God will bring something good.  This divorce has brought me to the brink, but it has also brought me straight to God.  Whenever I felt despair, He gave me hope– maybe through a song, or an encouraging word from someone.  Recently, I was mad at Jesus.  I had never been mad at Him before.  Maybe frustrated, but not angry.  I didn’t pray or read the Bible for a long while.  I was angry because I felt as if God didn’t care about me.  He had been there for me, but He still felt so distant.  Sometimes, he still does.  But I have come to realize that He is in control.

Maybe things don’t make sense.  Maybe you’re at rock bottom, looking for a way up.  Maybe you don’t trust Jesus because he seems far away– at the top, not really offering to help.  He’s in Heaven, while you’re stuck on this miserable, sinful, unfair planet.

I understand.  I’ve felt this way too.  But I want to tell you that He’s there.  He’s by your side.  He knows how you feel.  I struggled with the fact that I was so alone, but the whole time, Jesus was by my side, trying to tell me something important.

“I love you, and I want you in Heaven with me.”

Maybe not today.  Maybe not tomorrow.  We’ve still got work to do here on Earth.  There are men and women who’ve never heard of God, and those that don’t believe.  God will bring good out of your bad experiences.  Maybe you have a story to tell– one that will change someone’s life.  You’re part of a bigger picture.

So trust in Him.  I’m trusting that this story will help someone– it was hard to write this, to open up to the world.  But I want His will to be done.  I want to spread the word that even in hard times, Jesus will set us free.  He will open us up.  He will give us hope.

He did it for me.

Project Feathers 2012 // Maya

I don't believe it's completely possible to understand the depth of God's love unless you feel the hate of the world first. And I grew up feeling it. Everyday of my childhood was filled with pain and not understanding. Divorce, death, mean relationships, and difficult circumstances filled the years I was supposed to live in a world of rainbows and childhood bliss. It was rough and I grew to fear waking up every morning...what would one day more bring? I grew to have a bitter heart. I hated my Dad who left me family when I was young. I hated my Step Father who thought he could ever replace the gap of being fatherless. I hated my sister's boyfriend who treated her and my family like we were trash.

I would grow apart from God in those years. I didn't understand.

When my sister Emily was almost 18 (trust me...there's a point in telling you all this) she went to a retreat and were able to hear the Gospel for the first time and Em was saved. I saw a radical change in her life.. It made me wonder.

I was 13 and Emily kept sharing the Gospel with me. But I didn't listen and continued to live for myself. She made me go to Church one Sunday. Then she made me go to a youth retreat with her. I did because I couldn't help desiring what Em had. One of the nights I suddenly felt a deep burden of guilt I could not describe. I felt a fire and a rushing wind upon my back and I was shaking in fear. For the first time, I was certain there was a God but I knew I was not worthy of Him. The next day I told Emily this and once more she shared the Good News with me. I was overwhelmed and cried. That night I called upon His mighty name to wash my new with the blood.

I couldn't believe He would be kind to me, a sinner. He would die for me, a sinner. For I had broken almost all of God's law. I was a girl of morals growing up and taught that "If I was good, good things came." But the truth was I was to be eternally damned to hell and eternal suffering. I was dead in my sin. I was simply a thing of this world to fade away. I, along with all, deserve hell.
But God, being rich in mercy called me to be a disciple of him. I was naked but he clothed me in righteousness and I now I follow him with all of me.

I finally understood someone loved me for me. He loved me so much he would die for me.

It's been 5 and half years since that day when the Lord called me to be His. And I have been through a lot since but everyday my joy of Christ my Lord been as great. Because He loves me I want to live the rest of my life proclaiming to others this love. Oh, that I, a sinner may cry Hallelujah! What kind of a love is this?

It's been a hard journey, but I know God is faithful..and is leading me home.

Project Feathers 2012 // Anonymous

Three years ago, my life changed. I didn't notice it at first, it was very subtle. But it grew. Three years ago, my innocence was taken. Gone forever, just by a simple holding of the hand, by a simple touch of the waist, by the simple caress on the thigh. By the simple light kiss on the cheek, and that was all it took, no more. The person was someone who i was very close to. All of those things may not seem like such a big deal to some people but i am one of those people who put a lot of meaning into little things. I was a girl who wants to feel wanted and loved, I was a girl who was lonely. But this person was someone who wasn't supposed to be doing these things to me. I was scared after a while, I wasn't sure if this was wrong or right, okay or not okay. He told me its okay, but was it? I was so confused, it was like I was trapped with a question, and there was absolutely no way out. I was scared of the person, because I thought if i told, I would get hurt or worse. My life was in pieces. The person began to date another person. I now knew it was wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong, all the way around, I should have know before, but my fear clouded my judgement. Finally I made it stop. I told him, "no, I don't want this to happen any more, no more." he said "okay" I saw that he too was scared. I was even more confused because I had always been taught to never tell on another person, besides, he had told me to keep it a secret. So I kept it inside for two years. For two long years the secret ate away at me. I became depressed, I no longer trusted myself or any other person. My family saw I was different and asked me always what was wrong but I kept my feeling bottled up inside me until I became bitter towards my family, until i was not me any more. my life had changed.

One day my mom sat me down and told me to tell her what was wrong, why I was so depressed, she said that it seemed that there was something I was not telling her. I denied and denied, then the tears came, I came up with a lie and told her it was school. That school was too much, that she and my dad it seemed, always expected me to excel in every aspect of school and that I couldn't take it. But I continued to be secluded.

Another time my mom did the same thing again because that's what moms do, they never give up on their children. This time I told her that someone had hurt me and that I was sad. She accepted this and I told her that I would take care of it. But I didn't. It wasn't until at a Church youth camp that I realized that this secret was Satan's way of ruling my life. That my not forgiving myself was separating my relationship with God, which is why I didn't have peace with myself. I confessed everything to my pastors' wife and then my parents.

I am absolutely not healed. I am still taking baby steps through the process of self-forgiveness and the forgiveness of him. God is showing me that there is more to life than my past mistakes. That I don't have to let my past rule my future and that when I allow that, I am not who God wants me to be. A happy, loving, FREE, girl who loves her Lord. God continues to work in me every day. I have recently become more open with my story by sharing it with my friends, I have found that by opening up and telling people it helps me to come to peace with myself just my talking about my past. God is amazing. A missionary who came to visit my church recently said that pain is the way we can get closest to God, that pain is how we build a stronger relationship with Him, when God takes everything away all we have to lean on is Him. It reminds me of the song, I Find You When I Fall Apart. The lyrics say "my whole world is caving in, but I feel you now, more than I did then. How can I come to the end of me and still have all I need. God I want to know you more, maybe this is how it starts. I find You when, You will find me when, I fall apart"

 Pain is God's way of drawing us closer to Him.
 This is my story.

just a little reminder

project FEATHERS begins this coming sunday, so if you've got a story to share, i am still accepting emails :)

xoxo. hannah

Feathers 2012 // Set Your Soul Free

These last few weeks, Jesus has been asking me the question frequently, "How can you continue to grow Genuine? What can you do as the next step?"

So I prayed about it. I considered many different ideas as possible steps forward and Jesus gave me the inspiration to start project Feathers.

November 11th-17th of this year, Genuine's blog floor is going to be opened up to the world. And I will ask you this question:

How has Jesus set you free? 

What I mean is, how has He taken your struggles and turned them into something that has changed you for the better? I know He took my losing a friend and turned it into learning to see the beauty in me, without looking to people to tell me that I am. He took a serious, dead, cold, perfectionist's heart and turned it into a loose and wild and free one... and still is. He gave me a hope and He gave me a future. Every day, growing me. So I am still in the process of healing. Maybe you are, too. You don't have to be completely set free yet. It's okay not to be okay.

What does this look like for you?
And will you share that beautiful story with us?

Will you be brave? 

Will you step off your branch? 

Will you join me in healing? 

Contributors will be asked to send in their story via email ( *deadline Nov. 7th* ). One story will be posted per day, so I will not be taking more than seven stories. Maybe next year, depending on this year's turnout, I will do more :) If you decide to join in on this experience and want your story to remain anonymous, that is totally fine. I will completely respect that.

My prayer is that Jesus is calling you to do this. And if so, I'm not asking for something long and poetic and perfect. Because people aren't perfect, and that's what I am trying to get across here with Genuine. It's about not being perfect, but it's about being real.

And that's really the only thing that matters.

choosing joy,
hannah